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Socialism Love & Hate; A Primer…& SEO “Brilliance”

Friday I agitated people. I was looking at all variables in my life, wondering what's different, feeling a need to change things up. I zeroed in on my Twitter and Facebook presences. I intended to delete both and focus only on blogging. I put out that idea and plan on both channels, and got back a lot of feedback as I was drafting the foregoing.

In the meantime, since I'm brilliant at SEO—you're all morons, you see—and the only reason you read is because God Google sends you here, this serves as just another brilliant tactic for all you idiots out there. Let brilliance commence. Are you ready?

~~~

Various facets and degrees of human social experience interest me immensely. Anarchists are like that, since natural social interaction is all you've got to go on, normally. On the other hand, I have eyes, ears, a sense of touch & smell, and a mind. I'm a social animal, too—as are we all. Let's talk Twitter, and Facebook Pages and Groups in that context.

"Social networks," so called, have failed for me on every level if I really do an honest assessment. Drama, lately. The most important is to sit in calm contemplation and ask myself how it happened: what was the root cause? The root cause is always behavioral in nature, but what's motivating such behavior on my part that results in others' behavior; unwelcome retaliatory behavior?

I don't fully know the answer to any of that, because it was so clear that in my particular life and circumstance, it was multi-factorial: going from brash blogger—very well respected for that—specifically—to brash blogger that has gained enough haters to probably take note of. ...Haters do not "Make Me Famous." If if that were the case, I'd immediately become a lover of shit I hate & loath. Barf.

In September of 2010, we moved from our downtown loft into a house in the burbs with a yard for the dogs. By that time, my blog was riding high, I was getting tons of comments on most posts (more now, actually), and I was looking in terms of a book or other "soft" monetization, which is to say: "allow me to make a modest income off of this and we'll all be happy." I loath the hard marketing—the stupid shit hundreds of start-up Paleo bloggers have tried to undertake and failed immediately or soon enough, mostly. Good.

I had a Twitter account and my FB Page when I lived in the lofts. That's what everyone did. Here's an interesting variable. I used to charge my iPad (iPhone prior) once every 2-3 days. Now, because I have a wonderful and natural backyard I sit in year round, I charge my iPad twice a day. Important variable? The interesting social uniqueness about Twitter and FB is that if you have enough followers or "friends," there's sure to be a number online at any given time. You can have "real"time interaction 24/7, especially if you're pretty international. Let me ask you something. Is that normal? Is it normal that you have a pseudo friend available 24/7 for you? And if it's not, how does that effect your behavior over months—or 2 years?

Ever got a phone call that shocked the life out of you, delighted or horrified you at the same time or one or the other, out of the blue? No matter how that worked out, you were dealing with the voice of a real person—a love of life perhaps—and too bad there was no Facebook. You'd have already known. Perhaps that's a good thing. Perhaps it's not.

For me, it's quite simple. I lived in downtown, with friends galore therein, that equaled almost daily socializing. Then I moved away and they were all gone. Sure, everyone makes an initial effort but pretty soon, you're left to your own in the back yard with an iPad. Where once the blog/social day was over around 5, thankfully—and it can wait—it soon became my replacement. But it's not the same as sitting face to face with friends I love, me cooking them dinner, going to their place or even collaborating based on what's in refrigerators.

Are we built to set that aside? Maybe yes; maybe no. Maybe new and modern social paraphernalia is a push to greater social evolution—beyond our hunter gatherer limit of 30-60 people to account for—that we can ultimately handle and still feel like we have a handle.

~~~

That was the extent of the draft. At any rate, instead of getting out of the Twitter and Fabebook presence for the blog, I've repurposed it them. Also, a while back I wrote of what I was going to do about my personal Facebook page and that worked out quite well. I now spend more time with friends and family I know in real space, and less on the FTA Facebook page and Twitter account.

Comments

  1. A.B. Dada says:

    Get yourself an Energizer XPAL XP18000 battery pack. I have 2 of these, one of them is actually a permanent part of my purse (sewn in).

    It allows me to keep my iPad charged on whatever beach of French cafe I happen to be at. I haven’t been beneath 90% ever.

    I also make a valiant (and often failed) attempt at de-digitizing before 10am and after 8pm. Great to play with analog life after waking and before bedtime.

    • “I also make a valiant (and often failed) attempt at de-digitizing before 10am and after 8pm. Great to play with analog life after waking and before bedtime.”

      For a very long time I had a groove where at around 5pm I was done. Every now and then, I’d have a post that took into the evening to draft. But our life was so social I just never gave a care, and my evening was reserved for me, and if I did involve in comments it was light and rare.

      But it was a function of the general social milieu. We’ll see.

    • It allows me to keep my iPad charged on whatever beach or French cafe I happen to be at.

      Dada, you are my favorite sitcom character.

  2. I think that was one of the findings of much of the happiness research. Almost everyone thinks they’ll be happier with more land and a less-crowded neighborhood, so they move.

    Researchers find that their perceived happiness almost always dropped.

    It’s part of why so many couples get divorced after building their “dream house.” They are counting on the new house to restore their happiness — but then it makes things worse.

    • A.B. Dada says:

      I’m not sure I agree with that research because it’s over-acute.

      In my experience (both personal and anecdotal evidence of others), I think the biggest burden for most new marriages is the exceptional number of anchors that both partners bring into the relationship, as well as new anchors they create after the union.

      These anchors are: (1) debt, (2) single “home” with no competitive options, (3) single income per income provider with no competitive options, (4) children with only one option for education (“public school”).

      As people add their own burdening anchors to their lives, of course they’re going to be unhappy. Human’s greatest source of happiness comes from choices, not from the lack of choices. Monogamy is hard enough to live (monopoly on sexual partner choice), throw in limitations in the rest of life and I do believe people will be unhappy by default.

      I am in the process of finally having the foundation I want before having children. I have partner in mind that I want to elevate to the status of domestic partner. I have multiple tiny “homes” across borders. I have multiple small businesses that provide me with multiple income streams where I don’t have to rely on any one income to survive. I have close knit communities I continue to be part of, also across boarders.

      Will I be happy? Will my domestic partner be happy? Will our children be happy? There’s no guarantee, but from what I have witnesses in just the past few years, I think so.

      The problem with choice for most people is that they typically chose the option that is the fastest and cheapest, versus the one that requires the most thought and diligent work to acquire. I don’t pick cheap and fast, I always defer to the choice that will offer the longest term return on investment, even if that investment requires more time and money committed.

      A life without self-committed anchors is the life I want to live.

      • AB, I read that and I think of Europeans in tiny Mediterranean villages. I suppose it would cross over to rural area in the states.

        I have this suspicion that for a lot of us, knowing a lot and having a lot of life experience can fuck things up. You have to be careful with what you know.

      • dr. gabriella kadar says:

        In any tiny village there is a huge social pressure to conform to whatever are considered to be societal norms. It seems in places where a person is estranged from the neighbours for whatever reason (could be ‘new kid on the block’, living in a highrise apartment) acting out becomes easier because it can be almost anonymous.

      • “I have partner in mind that I want to elevate to the status of domestic partner.”

        Don’t do it your life will become a living hell, domesticated partner is okay but once you start talking about domestic “partner” then you are no longer captain of your own ship, and next thing you know they are talking crap about you on the internet with utter impunity.

      • Imo the number one priority in choosing a domestic partner is “Does it come to you like a dog when you feed it?”

      • rob,
        imo the number one priority in choosing a domestic partner is “Does it shut-up when you throw a blanket over its cage?”

      • dr. gabriella kadar says:

        ‘Human’s greatest source of happiness comes from choices, not from the lack of choices’

        Does that apply to fabric softener?

      • “Does that apply to fabric softener?” – +1, laf!

      • Can I assume this is some sort of humour that requires a specific set of anatomical bits and pieces to understand? Cus, I don’t get it ladies…

      • dr. gabriella kadar says:

        If you are true Paleo then of course you don’t understand. Authentic Paleo people chew animal skins to soften them.

      • EatLessMoveMoore says:

        A.B. -

        Man… You sound so happy, dude. I want what you got!

      • Yup, agree 100%. You have to be careful though. Some people may interpret this behaviour as psychopathic. If people see you this way it can severely hinder your progress. Number (4) is really important!

      • Just to clarify, I agree with points (1) to (4) and I apply them to my own life. I have no idea if this is Dadda-happiness or not.

  3. Facebook is an enabling technology for sub-par relationships. With Facebook, I can know the birthday of the person I don’t care about enough to know by heart. I can stay in touch with all the people I didn’t care enough to stay in touch with before Facebook. Hmmm…so the value is?

    Well, the value is getting you to stay online, and that’s valuable to Facebook.

    Thanks, Facebook and booklers, for marginalizing the word friend. No application of technology turns acquaintances into friends, takes an investment of time, energy, and emotion. I’m going to make AcquaintanceBook and BarelyKnowYouBook, and WhoTheHellIsThisBook for the 96% of people on Facebook.

    To my friends: When your water heater bursts at 2am, you can call me and not only will I grab both shop vacs and head over to help, but I’ll joke with you and infuse humor into a bad situation. Why? Because I’m your friend and you’re mine. And we use that same word for the person we barely knew 20 years ago who just friend-requested us? Bah. Puts a bad taste in my mouth.

    I don’t like people enough to try to have more than a few dozen I interact with at some level of intimacy. Furthermore I accept that some will cycle in and out over the years and just a scant few will be with me to the end. There is actual value in those relationships, and I find joy in that.

    • Dr. Curmudgeon Gee says:

      @Bill Strahan,

      Amen to your comments of Facebook;
      (don’t have a FB account; my friends know how to find me so i don’t see the point)

      • Uh oh. When the only comment on my thoughts is a positive response from a curmudgeon…

        :)

      • Robert Ve says:

        You should have expected that when you hated on facebook. Facebook is awesome, join or be shunned!

      • I should have included this in the post, didn’t think of it at the time…perhaps I’ll add as an addendum.

        http://freetheanimal.com/2012/06/my-hunter-gatherer-social-experiment-with-facebook.html

        That has worked out quite well. My personal FB is now around 30 folks or so who are friends, family…people I know in real space with only a couple of people I either have a great online affinity with or, have known for many years online–a couple going back 15 years.

        that part of FB is now quite cool because most updates I want to actually see, or if I don’t, big deal (it’s of no interest to me that you’re, tired, cold, hungry, horny, etc.).

        At any rate, after some more thorough investigation it appears there’s a lot more traffic from those sources than I realized. So everything’s a go.

      • Dr. Curmudgon Gee says:

        i get many “invitations” from FB & google+. pretty annoying. they go straight to the spam folder.

        i’m old; i don’t want to change.

        i still write long hand using a fountain pen; cause i’m a Luddite. haha XD)

      • One of the things I began a few days after Michael died, was what I called my “morning missive.” I would write a “yes, I’m still here; here’s what I’m thinking and feeling and what I’m doing” email and send it out. My dear, dear neighbors, who also loved and respected Michael, kept telling me it was good I did that, or they’d be over here peering in the windows and bangin’ on the door makin’ sure I was okay!

        I ended up with about 40-50 people getting my ‘missives.’ (!) I had two lists: Family Sitrep and Other Sitrep; for some folks (“family”) I was more personal, more open; for “others” it was more casual. As I struggled to recover the business, as I fought the credit card companies, and got first smashed (“do it over!”) and then saved by the judge (“petition granted”) and so on… Well, it was a sort of very personal email “blog.” By whining or wailing or snarling or screaming in writing, I was able to ‘work through’ what was going on (and going wrong) in my life.

        A couple of times, I would ask people to let me know if they wanted off the mailing list. A few (“others”) did. Over time, too, the emailing frequency decreased — now, it’s maybe 2-3 times a month.

        The odd part I noticed was that whereas, early on, many people would call to see how I was doing, as time passed, fewer people called, and fewer answered my missives. It’s always this way… everyone goes back to their ‘normal’ lives; only *my* life has changed utterly and forever. The struggle with electronic connection is that it’s the case that THEY feel “in-touch” — THEY have caught up with me, and so it doesn’t occur to them that *I* have not had contact from them. I struggled with loneliness, because I’d had “conversations” with friends and family (and acquaintances) — but they were one-sided for (from) me.

        Knowing people in “real space” is hugely different. (And necessary!)

  4. Love the way your thinking!! I think many people are contemplating these deeper questions in the same way! The more advanced we become the more uprooted and ungrounded we’ve become. Thanks for sharing!

  5. Richard,

    there was a time when it was possible to create social circles where you only mixed with people who you saw eye-to-eye with. People that you disagreed with were simply ignored and removed from your circle (mother-in-laws and the like, maybe not, but close enough). Your enemies, or potential enemies, knew very little about you and therefore had very little potential to influence your life. Now of course, with the internet, that is different. It is possible for your enemies know nearly as much about you as your friends. You have shown a hell of a lot of your personal life and personality on-line. Given it’s such a strong personality it was always going to find a certain number of people who disliked it.

    Rich, family and pets first, always. Face-to-face friends next and everyone else can take a back seat. Seriously Rich, don’t give a second thought to how people you meet in the digital world might affect your life or your thinking. Treat us digital fuck-heads as entertainment – seriously!

  6. Very introspective Richard . . .

    regarding the lofts- something else to consider is age . . .

    as people grow older it is much harder to establish life long relationships as it is when when one is younger

  7. For a draft, that seemed like a very well thought out post, if somewhat meandering with a couple of false trails.

    I try to do my friendships “paleo”-style. Small group of under 100 people + extended family that I love to some degree or another.

    It really comes down to quality over quantity. In just about any sphere of my life, I’ll take quality over quantity, granted that the quantity is high enough to sustain life (e.g. food).

  8. Once upon a time children had imaginary friends. Now they have Facebook friends. Same diff.
    Except, your imaginary friends didn’t tend to bully you and be bullied by you so much. A little bit, maybe, but few kids were ever driven to suicide by their imaginary friends.
    Bring back Puff the Magic Dragon.

    Dada, are you fronting a Black Metal band yet? If not, why not?

  9. Oh, Richard, that 1,000 comment Jack Kruze post?
    Best online party ever,m and that’s coming from someone who turned up too late, but read all night.
    So the host got a bit carried away at times and some guests might not come back?
    You’ve still hosted the best online party ever.
    That’s pretty damn cool.