How About Have Your Church and Eat God Too?

I was explaining to a friend just now in email that I recently attended a Catholic wedding at a Catholic church and kinda loved it. Even the very brief homily was kinda useful, and the guy was pretty funny.

Good time for me, in a Catholic church.

…In spite of my practiced animus for religion, it’s really only the literalists that drive me insane—hell bent on imposing their conservatism on you. I loath conservatism and all it stands for, even the moronic premise of it. Values change in the span of a human life, too—unless you’re a moron wedded to an imaginary friend and can’t even think your way towards anything but the catechism. Moron Conservatives: We got all the values figured out and we’re not changing and moreover, we’re going to shove them down your throat.

Conservatives are far worse than liberal commies (the later actually have the capacity for change in my experience; conservatives, by definition, do not). Just take a look at the Middle East: conservatives. Contrast that with the former USSR and the continually evolving China. It’s really a shame that conservatives here aren’t regarded similarly, as well as exposed for their fervor in fighting the Islamist conservative competition. Don’t ever be fooled by a conservative Republican. They want to control your life if they can, and they believe they have God on their side. They’re fucking delusional. They understand economics better than commies, but that ought be obvious on its face. Imposition must be efficient.

Otherwise, I see not only a value to “church,” but perhaps even an imperative…if, you could just get it right. Given that previous sentence, you could maybe see Anarchy Begins at Home in a whole new light (9-part written series; 18 minute video). Here’s a title to titilate:


I’m kinda taking this in stride. Even if not all its cracked up to be in faith-healer-hype style, it does strike me as a value. Of course, there have been social organizations, societies, lodges and the whats knots forever, but this is more of a mainstream sounding accessible-to-all kinda deal.

Jones got the first inkling for the idea while leaving a Christmas carol concert six years ago.

“There was so much about it that I loved, but it’s a shame because at the heart of it, it’s something I don’t believe in,” Jones said. “If you think about church, there’s very little that’s bad. It’s singing awesome songs, hearing interesting talks, thinking about improving yourself and helping other people – and doing that in a community with wonderful relationships. What part of that is not to like?” […]

Sunday Assembly – whose motto is Live Better, Help Often, Wonder More – taps into that universe of people who left their faith but now miss the community church provided, said Phil Zuckerman, a professor of secular studies at Pitzer College in Claremont.

I want to shout at lots of people: you stupid fools. See? That’s what it was really all about all along. Perfectly natural, perfectly reasonable and moreover, salutary on may levels. This is the true and fundamental essence of anarchy.

Do you know why I loved church and the next door school I attended? Wasn’t God, it was Barbara Walton. I was like 13-15ish, and of course, she was the first one I managed to get to take any interest in me in the full frontal assault of hormonal cataclysm. It was great for months, including the extra-curricular family outings where SHE would be there. Seriously, didn’t give a fucking shit about Our Lord & Savior at the time in spite of my practiced lip service.

I’d found my mate for life. A blissful existence with kids was just around the corner. Then she dumped me, I got that essential lesson and then one day when she hinted otherwise—”Rick, I like your belt”—I learned the other essential lesson: burn bridges and don’t rebuild them.

This was all church, but had nothing to do with the Mother Goose moronity.

Greg Swann already blogged about this and if you haven’t yet read about how to focus on yourself (true anarchism) rather than on others, then take a peek.

When I start a church, I’m going to call it The Second Church of I-Don’t-Go-To-Your-Church

What I want is a mission devoted to the idea of doing better. Just that. The doctrine is mine, Man Alive, et very cetera, but I’m a lot more interested in praxis than dogma. If you cross a soul-enriching music performance with a mind-enflaming motivational seminar, you’re halfway to seeing what I see. […]

All I want to talk about is doing better, being better, becoming every day and step-by-tenuous-step a better person — in your own eyes. […]

The issue is this, discussed in Chapter 12 of Man Alive: Human beings worship. We can argue about the means and objects of worship, but it remains that we all do in fact worship in one way or another. And, as is argued in the book, the cardinal virtue of the fully-human life is the worship of the self by the self as the highest possible value in the uniquely-human life.

Does that idea need a church? I’m thinking it does. Certainly it hasn’t done well without one.

“Certainly it hasn’t done well without one.” That’s an entire long book there. With the added punchline: neither has domineering socialism done well with one.

And it’s because everyone is at odds with one-another. Two ways, and pretty much only 2 ways:

  1. The left wants you to believe in its God and in any case, impose it upon you.
  2. The right wants you to believe in its God, and in any case, impose it upon you.

Both Gods are imaginary. For the left, it’s the God of socialism, i.e., the very exact same Original Sin of the right.

Your code begins by damning man as evil, then demands that he practice a good which it defines as impossible for him to practice. It demands, as his first proof of virtue, that he accept his own depravity without proof. It demands that he start, not with a standard of value, but with a standard of evil.

So, all I’m saying is go to Church; eat God: which is to say, get it over with, digest it, get it out of your system and into a place where it belongs. Keep the good stuff. You know what it is you really like about church, right? Can you honestly say that you really enjoy the increasingly laughable interpretations of a jealous Jewish God writen 2,000 years ago, along with all the contortions to make it relevant?

Hell, I was laughing my ass off in divinity school in 1979, and had to leave.

It annoys me to be around stupid people for very long.

Make a critical distinction here: Church vs. God

Since Covid killed my Cabo San Lucas vacation-rental business in 2021, this is my day job. I can't do it without you. Memberships are $10 monthly, $20 quarterly, or $65 annually. Two premium coffees per month. Every membership helps finance this work I do, and if you like what I do, please chip in. No grandiose pitches.


  1. Greg Swann on November 12, 2013 at 16:14

    Love it!

    In addition to all its other salutary benefits, church is the only place left for ordinary people to take ideas seriously. I want to evangelize egoism, I say it all the time. But the noun is nothing without the verb, and evangelizing is church, tautologically.

  2. LeonRover on November 13, 2013 at 03:23

    Gheez (sic) Rich,

    Are you about to become a card carrying Theophagist ? A convert to an Hispanic style Catholic Church of Liberation ?

    Mirabile dictu – in mulieribus!

    Did you know that –

    A Victorian French medic believed that devout Catholics developed spiritual theophagocytes to absorb the Deity from the Blessed Bread of Heaven


    that Sigmund Fraud diagnosed a condition he called theophaginismus when consulted by a Viennese spinster who could no longer approach Communion when she had been rejected by her Catholic Pastor?

    Hmmmm!! (Is Fiction stranger than Truth ? – check out next week’s enthralling episode.)

    Sláinte as Rover

    P S I’ve gotten tired of Leon; thus Rover as nom de pirate.

  3. Bucket on November 13, 2013 at 10:15


    As one atheist to another… Might I recommend a book to you? Read CAESAR’S MESSIAH, The Roman Conspiracy to Invent Jesus by Joseph Atwill. Interesting read. The title tells all!


  5. Steve on November 14, 2013 at 04:33

    Hi I wanted to share why I started going to church.
    It is just when I was young I heard about some people who predict the future.
    I did go one day not knowing what the Bible says about it.
    I was told about should be careful with my diet. This is when trying the raw vegan or paleo foods.
    I liked reading, was told I was stressed and unwell, I did have stomach problems and going to have hospital check-ups. Thinking about going travelling? I was thinking about going.
    Could see getting involved with police, I was out with some friends very soon after and there was some fighting and that brought police officers around to ask personal details.
    Told I was good with finances, I wasn’t spending a lot.
    Other things mentioned, some came true others did not.

    Other reason is when I was sick asking for help, started eating a vegan fruit diet to help, but kept thinking is it evolution or creation? Then I put my name Steven Wallage into an anagram solver, also turns out to Vegans Eat Well just at the time.
    My first surname was Hook but changed after a second marriage of my parents.

    I have been looking into guides

    There are a lot of people into this spiritualism at I think many believe there is too much going on to believe otherwise.

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