There it was, at 1:00 pm on Friday last, at the Ancestral Health Symposium, in Atlanta.
Ketogenic Diets for Athletic Performance Panel
by Ben Greenfield, M.S., C.S.C.S., C-I.S.S.N., Jamie Scott, PGDipNutMed, PGDipSportExMed, Jimmy Moore, Mark Sisson, Robb Wolf, B.S.
OK, fine. Ketogenesis in the context of athletic performance is something we’re hearing a lot about, lately. That’s cool. On the surface, huge diff between, say, weight lifters and endurance athletes, and everything in-between. Let the debate rage; because, the whole point about it is to get some folks willing to experiment. But in the end, the cool thing about athletic competition is that: it is what it is. They will use the diet that works best for the application. They do not care about micronutrients or macronutrients, per se. They care about performance and competition. Those, like me—who couldn’t give a fuck amongst a nest of whores—still benefit by the knowledge gained where microseconds and milligrams count.
That’s one thing; but here’s the next, “courtesy” of Ben Greenfield.
Holy Fuck! Batman!
But hold on. There’s More! And it’s so hilarious…
Perhaps you’ve had this happen to you before…
…you’re at a health expo, a fair or a convention, and somebody suddenly pops out from a booth with a “magical bracelet”.
My name is Ben Greenfield, and as a personal trainer, nutritionist, and human performance coach, I’ve been to a good number of fitness events, and I’ve certainly had this happen to me.
And the story is always the same: I put on the bracelet, do the special muscle or balance testing and suddenly I notice…
That’s right, nothing.
From magnets to titanium to holograms, I never noticed any difference at all in performance, strength, balance, health or anything else.
And yet at some point in your life, you have probably also been hounded by wristband salespersons eagerly attempting to conduct muscle tests on you to verify that their magical wristband is going to turn you into some kind of a superhero
Oh really? You actually put it on with an open mind and gave it a test in athletic performance?
Then you’re dismissed as a fucking moron. Forever.
Y’all can read the whole laf if you want. Feel free to drop funny shit in comments. There’s a million—and it’s essentially every marketing shtick-trick in the book—designed for morons.
Look. This isn’t about differences in how much meat, fat, carbs—how dairy, natural starch, and maybe even legumes might fit into the whole ancestral/paleo equation. It isn’t even about a guy who drops c-bombs, but already had a few fans who’d known him for a long time in the community and was given a pass.
This is simply about a popup con man, in it for as much money as he can get quick. That simple. Read that crap again if you don’t believe deeply in Ben Greenfield’s essential depravity and his utter worthlessness a human being.
I’ll take a little of that back: I’m a sucker for genuine redemption.
…You know, I wondered where the hell he’d come from when everyone went running off to Spokane months ago.
…This may very well be the single thing that broke the camel’s back for me, so’s I don’t even celebrate anything going on in Ancestral / Paleo, anymore.
I’ll wish you well, but please keep your stink away from me.