No-Pill #43 Multiple Partners, Values, Differences

— The Complexities, Drawbacks, and Tradeoffs

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“This thought-provoking exploration delves into the challenges and potential pitfalls of multipartner relationships, advocating for deeper understanding and fulfillment in monogamous partnerships based on shared values and individual growth.”

Maintaining a romantic relationship with more than one partner can prove challenging for many, if not all, individuals. One of the main reasons is the emotional turmoil that can arise due to the inherent complexities of such relationships. Jealousy, insecurities, and disagreements can lead to a substantial amount of mental stress, which can be detrimental to one’s overall well-being. The rollercoaster of emotions that comes with juggling multiple romantic partners can be mentally draining and emotionally taxing, causing more harm than good to individuals.

The time and effort required to develop a meaningful relationship with a single partner are significant. It involves understanding the other person’s needs, building trust, fostering communication, and maintaining intimacy. These elements of a relationship cannot be rushed or taken lightly. It necessitates a great deal of time, patience, and emotional investment. Therefore, trying to establish these foundations with multiple partners would require an even greater commitment.

The prospect of engaging in multipartner relationships also raises practical concerns. For instance, the time spent on maintaining these relationships could be utilized elsewhere, in areas of life that are equally, if not more, important. The time commitment required for multipartner relationships might jeopardize an individual’s ability to focus on their career, work, or business.

A rewarding career or a successful business requires dedication, hard work, and most importantly, time. Balancing personal and professional life is a challenge in itself. Adding the complexities of multiple relationships would only complicate matters. It could lead to a lack of focus, which could potentially hinder one’s professional growth.

… Engaging in productive work, whether it is related to one’s job, hobby, or personal development, is essential for a person’s growth and satisfaction. It not only fosters skills and knowledge but also provides a sense of accomplishment. The time spent on developing multiple romantic relationships could instead be used to hone skills, learn new things, or simply engage in activities that bring joy and satisfaction.

The main drawback of multipartner relationships stems from the characteristics of psychuous sex: romantic love thrives best in long-term, monogamous relationships. Why is this so? It’s because consistent efforts and experiences with a single partner yield the highest levels of intimacy, personal growth, and shared values. As a result, the most sexually thrilling and gratifying experiences naturally arise from long-term, monogamous/psychuous relationships. Furthermore, the existence of sexually transmitted infections and diseases provides a practical and health-conscious reason to establish a deep and significant relationship with one trusted partner.

Every person’s values, inclusive of their sexual values, can be divided into two types—(1) values that are nonjudgmental or amoral, which emerge from one’s specific personality development, and (2) values that are objectively right or wrong, which surface from a person’s willful character development. A great deal of No-Pill/Psychuous concepts address the latter category, either directly or indirectly. These values are self-defined and mirror a person’s perspective on:

  • Self and others.
  • Rights of individuals.
  • Value of conscious life.
  • Work, productivity, creativity, achievement.
  • Acquiring knowledge and loyalty to honesty.
  • Acquiring personal pleasures and happiness.

Other concepts related to No-Pill/Psychuous discuss the neutral or unbiased values that mirror unique personal choices, such as:

  • Features that a person finds most appealing and exciting, both physically and psychologically, in a love partner.
  • Combination of values that deliver the greatest curiosity, excitement, satisfaction.
  • Most satisfying or pleasurable styles, methods, techniques.

Every person possesses a unique sexual value system, which is shaped by their experiences, personal preferences, and desires. These values differ greatly among individuals, largely influenced by their distinctive personality and tastes. These values aren’t subject to moral judgments or comparisons of right and wrong, better or worse. They simply mirror individual differences.

Contrary to most sex and marriage literature, a crucial task for every couple striving for romantic love and sensual pleasure isn’t to find compromises in their distinct sexual values, but to candidly understand each other’s sexual values. Once there is awareness of one’s own and one’s partner’s sexual values, these differences can be leveraged to enhance intimacy and pleasure. This profound intimacy is achieved by fulfilling the sexual values of one’s partner without compromising one’s own. In this journey, each partner becomes increasingly valuable and irreplaceable…unique to the other. Such relationships become more secure as romantic love flourishes without limitations. Divorces in these practical, non-idealistic relationships decrease towards zero as values and happiness increase with time and effort. All these increasing values are like deposits in a bank—a permanent, growing emotional bank account that can’t be replaced by anyone else.

In order to truly leverage the benefits of a No-Pill approach, one must constantly be conscious of the vast physical, intellectual, and psychological variations between individuals. People display extremely diverse traits in terms of their physical makeup, thought processes, knowledge domains, mental abilities, and life perspectives. As an individual shapes their character, a disparity arises in maintaining honesty versus succumbing to mystical beliefs. For instance, a person might find it easier to truthfully integrate facts in some aspects of life, while in others, they may fall into the trap of resorting to easier, mystical solutions. This inconsistency in honesty is a result of a person’s past and current decisions and actions. This voluntary behavior subsequently influences the pace of personal growth and the caliber of character development.

Many individuals often err in expecting others to mirror their own traits and behaviors, forgetting that each person is unique. Personal differences aren’t a matter of right or wrong. These amoral disparities are simply variations, devoid of moral judgment. Another common misconception is the idea that one can alter another’s core nature. Fundamental changes can only be initiated from within the individual. No external force or influence can impose such transformations.

… While multipartner relationships may seem appealing to some, the emotional conflicts and the significant time and effort required make it a challenging and potentially detrimental endeavor. It could compromise the time needed to develop other crucial areas of life, such as a rewarding career and productive work. Therefore, it may be beneficial to focus on building a meaningful relationship with a single partner and investing time in personal and professional growth.

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