A couple of days ago, on Saturday, I was chatting with my Thai girlfriend, Far, about her son, Timmy, who’s 14 and a total character. He’s half-English, half-Thai, the product of a fleeting romance about 20 years ago in her village up in Mukdahan province. Some English guy in the clothing import-export business was visiting a friend, one thing led to another, and boom—Timmy happened. That relationship’s long gone, but Timmy’s a great kid. My girlfriend was telling me he’s got a “hollow leg,” as we say in America, meaning the boy can eat like there’s no tomorrow, especially now that he’s a teenager with an insatiable appetite. So, I thought, let’s put that to the test.

I suggested we go on a food outing the next day, Sunday, and picked a spot called Robin Hood, an English-style pub on Second Road in Pattaya, Thailand. Ironically, it’s managed by a Frenchman, which gives me a chance to dust off my French when I pop in from time to time. He always greets me warmly, so it’s a great vibe. I asked Far if she wanted to bring her daughter, Pam and her boyfriend, Am, along. So, the four of them—Far, Timmy, Pam, and Am—joined me for this culinary adventure.

I’ll admit, I was a bit nervous. Introducing Thai folks to “farang” food (farang is what they call white foreigners) hasn’t always gone well for me. Robin Hood’s got Thai dishes on the menu, but I encouraged everyone to try something Western, just to mix things up. Luckily, we had a server who was a pro at recommending farang dishes that Thai people tend to enjoy. To my surprise, Far went for a beefsteak—a small, imported Australian fillet, à la carte (with a mushroom sauce). The restaurant even threw in a complimentary side of bacon-wrapped asparagus, which, let me tell you, is absolutely glorious if you’ve never tried it. Timmy, the star of the show, ordered salmon, which floored me. Pam and Am both went for chicken Parmesan, which was another surprise since they picked the same dish.

As the meal unfolded, I was so pleased watching everyone share their food with each-other and obviously enjoying everything. Timmy, true to his hollow-leg reputation, earned the superstar award. Not only did he polish off his entire salmon, but he also demolished a good chunk of his mom’s fillet and helped his older sister, Pam, finish her chicken Parmesan. Far loved her steak. She loved how it was so tender. That’s part of the reason Thais generally eschew beef. Thai beef does not generally win any awards. For my part, I had a hefty 400-gram bone-in pork chop, which hit all the right spots. Thai pork is excellent, and many Germans tell me it’s the best pork in the world—like German pork was decades ago.

It was a fantastic, heartwarming experience, seeing everyone enjoy themselves and try something new. And the bill? For all that food—my pork chop, the 200-gram Australian fillet, Timmy’s salmon, two plates of chicken Parmesan, and that glorious bacon-wrapped asparagus—it came to ฿3,000. Off the top of my head, that’s about $90 USD, maybe $100 with a tip. Not bad for a feast like that.