That’s right. All of them. Every last one!

Living here in the South Bay Area of California with its 300+ days of nice weather, I’ve never had a pressing need to have central air conditioning installed. So, for the few weeks it’s hot at night, we open windows and fire up the ceiling fans throughout the house.

Can’t remember  ever before in my life being bothered by crickets. Usually, it’s kind of that reverberating hummmm with the up and down change in pitch. It can even be soothing.

But last night, I had the 100 lb. variety; just outside the window; taunting me. It’s a higher pitch, loud as hell, and it doesn’t stop. Ever. For hours. Jesus! Finally, at about 2:00 am, in complete irrational consternation, I storm through the glass sliding doors to kill me some crickets. Yea, like, right; I’m gonna find the little buggers in the dark and they’re going to sit still while I crush them. To make it worse, there were at least two of them, at opposite ends of the yard. As I’d walk towards one, he (or, she: how the hell should I know?) would stop his bleating and the other one would start. I walk the opposite way, and guess what?

Jesus. Kill them all.