Testosterone: I’ve Gained 20 Pounds In 40 Days

— Whatever will I do?

“Renowned blogger Richard Nikoley shares his personal journey of transformation, offering a brutally honest and deeply insightful account of gaining weight and reclaiming control over his life. This is an essential read for those ready to break free from societal expectations and take full authority for their own lives.” — Chatbot Zon

The hard makes it great.

Hold that thought. I’ll get back to it.

… The story of the scale is this.

That’s me in on June 10, 2022, 16 months ago—and 2 months almost to the day from when I stopped boozing [way] too much and [way] too often.

I stopped entirely, as it has tuned out—just over 14 months, now—and I’m long past the point of no return. Can’t think of anything I need less than a gram of the stuff. Hard to reconcile being so fucking stupid about it for so fucking long…but it is what it was. Don’t look back.

It’s kinda the watershed pic in terms of the bottom. I’m not sure when it was exactly, but it was between then and August 7 when I stopped, that I had largely lost my appetite for any food, and I suspected mightily that the booze was the clear and certain cause.

Three days proved that to be the damn truth. I caught the shit in time, but not before suffering alcohol-induced sarcopenia. I started eating, hit the gym, walked a lot, swam and snorkeled in the ocean a lot…everything worked.

Nothing didn’t work. It’s important to say that because it goes toward saying that there are no fucking excuses:

  1. You have no excuse for being fat.
  2. You have no excuse for having too little muscle.
  3. You have no excuse for eating like a kid in a candy store.
  4. You have no excuse for sitting on your [fat] ass in front of the TV every night rather than finding something better to do most nights (sex, anyone?).
  5. You have no excuse for lacking the desire, attractiveness, will, and seductive instinct to have sex regularly.
  6. You have no excuse for looking like a slob.
  7. You have no excuse for feeling like crap.
  8. You have no excuse for poor performance at school, work, or business.
  9. You have no excuse for sleeping too little or too much.
  10. You have no excuse for engaging in behaviors and practices you know to be detrimental to getting to the place you know you want to be.

On number 10: hopes, wishes, and dreams are for lazy suckers and chumps who will sooner spend money on some “Easy Way To X” than to form a vision of where they aim to be in X months or years, grab a pen & paper, and list all the hard steps it’s going to take to get there.

And then fucking get to work.

… No, I’ll just get on the internet, Google until I find the easy way for only $99.95, and it’s as good as done (in your mind only, and it only means it will almost certainly never get done).

To the left is September 3, 2022, just coming up on the 1-month-no-booze point, and it was taken in the gym. No idea what my weight might have been at the point I stopped, but no matter, that’s 83 kilos (183 pounds) of over fat, under muscled.

To the right is the 1st day of July 2023, just over 3 months ago. It was the day I began the very intense SHRED30 program, where it was 30-days straight of ass-busting in the gym. It’s professionally designed based upon known recovery periods for different muscles, so some, I was doing very frequently (calves) and some, infrequently (hamstrings).

So, over that 10 months between those pictured weigh-ins, I put on 5 kilos (11 pounds). That was likely lean-mass recovery, mostly. The pants were no tighter.

Importantly, at the end of that 30 days, I stepped on the scale and I had gained 1 kilo (2.2 pounds). In this case, the shoulder area of my shirts were substantially filled out, and my pants were getting loose. Probably a 5 pound fat loss and a 7 pound lean gain for a net of 2 gained.

(This, incidentally, is the ideal way to recomposition your body. You lose fat but also gain lean, the amount of lean gain being determined by how over-fat and under-lean you were. The caveat is that most really fat people are not under lean in absolute terms, even at high body-fat percentages. When you eat too much too often, you’re adding both fat and lean, so for really fat people it’s normal to lose some lean while losing fat. The reason for hitting the gym is to preserve and make toned and fit, as much of that lean as you can.)

Ok, so fast-forward to the last time I weighed in. That was at Muscle Factory in early September, right as I was several weeks into the Longevity LP (for older lifters) by the same guy who wrote SHRED30.

I didn’t snap a pic, but I recorded it in Jefit.

I hadn’t even thought to weigh in since, but in this now NEW program I’m doing (Achilles, a 12-week program, by the same guy), it has wide-grip pull-ups (4×10) or alternatively, wide-grip cable lat pull downs. I figured, do the hard thing, but because no way I’m going to do many meaningful pull-ups at 211 pounds, I’m using the weight-assisted machine. If you want to track the weight you’re actually pulling up, you’ve got to weigh in, so you know where to set the weight assist for that day.

Long story longer, I saw 96 and did a no way. Had to do it again.

Yes. Way.


  1. Everyone who uses the word “anabolic” regarding steroids is a parroting ignoramus, including the talking-heads on the TEEVEE. There are no exceptions.
  2. Anabolic refers to metabolic processes that build more complex molecules from simpler ones; catabolic is the opposite: breaking down complex molecules into simpler ones.
  3. The term catabolic steroids—referring to cortisone and prednisone, for example—is something that has been said by no one ever.

Number three, there, tells you exactly why people who mouth “anabolic steroids”—instead of, say “molecule-or-tissue-building steroids”—do so because nobody knows what the fuck anabolic means, including themselves, they count on that, and also the fact that it sounds sinister and bad.

Somebody doin somethin bad!

What it really means is: “I’m fucking pathetic by comparison, so better besmirch it and knock it down, signal my virtue and desirability by comparison.”

Don’t do bullshit, people. You know that what I just said is what it’s really all about when you get down to brass tacks.

… And besides, in total, that gain from my lowest at 83Kg in September last year to 96Kg yesterday, a gain of about 29.5 pounds, is very near all lean gain (starting from an under-lean place), likely with some measure of fat loss, though that has not been any dedicated aim (NOW it will be). That’s over the space of 13 months, 4.3 pounds per month. About a pound per week.

When did I start DOPING!!!???

I began the testosterone injections exactly 3 weeks ago, on Wednesday evening, September 20. The HGH started exactly 8 days ago, around noon, Wednesday, October 4.

6 Days Before TRT Commencement

So now you can suspect why I’m posting all of this here—now. Because: as sure as the sun will set tonight and rise again tomorrow, there will eventually be loathsome cucks and cunts out there saying “RICHARD IS ON ANABOLIC STEROIDS AND GROWTH HORMONE. HE’S DOPING. THE RESULTS AREN’T REAL!!!”

What they really mean is that they’re less than pathetic and worthless. They can’t even pick themselves up after a defeat, as I’ve handily done. They certainly can’t do 66 brutal, ass-busting gym sessions in 104 days, including 30 days straight to kick it off during the whole month of fucking-hot July in Thailand, in an outdoor gym called Zoo Gym, enclosed by chain-link fence.

You know I’m dead on the money here.

Given my history, and now my solid victory, there are hundreds out there who fucking hate it.

They were always pathetic and unworthy, they knew it about themselves back then, and the fact is, even at my miserable worst with the drunk blogging and social media, I was still far better than they could ever hope to be.

Now I’ve proved it unequivocally.

So to all of them: Fuck off. You’re dismissed.

Look people. It’s really simple. All of it. Simply always pick the hard thing. There’s very little that’s likely to go wrong; if it does, then, well, you’ve got experience doing the hard shit, right?

What’s the alternative?

Now let’s elaborate on some nuances here with bodyfat percentages, and in particular, my clear path to sub-10% that won’t be easy, but something else. Also, an astounding resource on all things performance-enhancing and longevity I came across. Finally, how to fuel this kind of muscle gain from the ANABOLIC kitchen, without becoming a blimp—with actual photos of whole foods, so you can see for yourself—and lick your chops. That also includes my pre-workout mini-meal discovery recently that, if anything like me, will boost your gym performance about 9% (my figures); but, best of all, will have you going from routine-to-routine with a smile on your face, a positive attitude in your head, and anticipation in your heart.

First, recall what I wrote above and the ideal way to recomposition, where you’re gaining lean mass while losing fat…or if very obese, you’re holding on to, strengthening, and toning the lean you’ve already built from overeating.

Let’s suppose I was at 20% bodyfat back in June 2022, when that unflattering picture was taken, and I was maybe 80Kg (176 pounds, 35.2 pounds of it fat). Now, let’s say that in the run all the way to my current 96Kg, 211 pounds, that I lost no fat. My pants are looser, and I’m visibly leaner in some areas, but let’s just say there’s no fat loss, still 35.2 pounds.

What does it mean?

It’s means that I’ve gone from a bodyfat percentage of 20% at 176 pounds, to a percentage of 16.6% at 211.

What happens if I gain no additional lean, and only drop 10 pounds of body fat? Then, 25.2 pounds at 201 on the scale, 12.5%.

What happens if I gain another 10 pounds of lean, and lose 15 pounds of fat? This is a very realistic proposition for me, given where I’ve positioned myself.

I would be 206 on the scale, 20.2 pounds BF.

9.8% BF!

See how powerful gaining lean mass is, rather than constantly focussing on diet fat loss diet fat loss diet fat loss?

I think I have my marching orders. And it won’t be easy, but it’s hard-doable and I have the vision. Let’s call it that: Hard-Doable. We’re into HD!

I’ll map out the steps to realize the vision. Good excuse for another post.

… Here’s the food, which is definitely not focussed on leaning. It’s focussed on bulking and gaining BUT, importantly, by targeting protein first and foremost, keeping carbs real, and eschewing ADDED fat, it’s difficult to put on much, if any fat. Your protein needs to be north of 40% of the calories, though.

So the gravy you see there in some photos is the most wonderful thing. There are numerous British foodstuffs here, far more so than typically available in America.

One of the things those clever limeys have come up with is “gravy granules.” That’s 1 heaping tsp, and I slowly stir in about 1/2 cup of boiling water, more/less for desired consistency, from thick gravy to light sauce. You can add stuff to it. Common for me is the sautéed onions you see. Crushed black pepper. Cayenne pepper. Tarragon, etc.

What are the base ingredients? Potato starch, palm oil, and magic. Seriously, that portion there is 17 kcal. 2g carb, 1g fat, about a half G protein. It’s so ridiculously yummy and cheap… I loved making the careful sauce reductions I used to do that would take ours. Expensive, though? Holy shit. Just a portion like that, above, would be north of 5 bucks.

You can see I’m eating a lot of protein. This is the key. And, chewing it. Not drinking it (though a shake before bed to fuel hypertrophy while you sleep, which not being uncomfortable, gastrointestinally, probably a decent idea).

But I’m not really avoiding carbs. I just don’t eat a bunch of them together with protein and particularly, fat.


Alcohol —> Carbohydrates —> Protein —> Fat

If you have enough of the first three to fuel your energy demands but also have fat, the body is more than overjoyed to store the fat for you for a later time. The metabolic pathways to do that are designed for it. In the evolutionary “mind” of our bodies, storing fat is the most wondrous thing it can do, and it hates to part with it.

This has resulted in increasingly eating substantial fruit, along with modest honey, perhaps 2-4 TBS per day.

So, When I’m not eating one of my 2 big protein meals per day and I eat something, it’s apples and oranges, mostly, from the fridge. I like cold, crisp Fuji apples more than Snickers bars…and I like Snickers bars as candy goes; second, of course, to genuine English toffee which so far, seems unobtainable in Thailand, despite supermarkets with whole isles devoted to European chocolates, just like everyplace in Europe I digress.

I can eat upwards of 8-10 pieces in some mix of apples/oranges per day. Not idea what the carb count on that is. Those carbohydrates are always eaten by themselves, so no measurable protein or fat. They get digested and metabolized without incident. You know how a meal can make you tired? Yea, my big protein/fat meals do that, even if zero or trace carbs.

2 apples, 2 oranges, 2 TBS honey? Nope. No problem.

Here are two variations on the pre-workout meal. Both have 1 apple, 1 orange, and about 2 TBS honey. The difference is the low-fat yogurt. That’s what I was doing initially and it was good. Then one day I ran out of yogurt, so had it without. Noticeable improvement in gym energy, so that’s what I do now.

… One of the members posted a recent vid of Dr. Peter Attia, whom I know personally, with some guy who is like the most knowledgeable gym-bro in the whole world, and it becomes obvious. They’ll have your head spinning. I still haven’t finished it, but close enough. I’m watching at 1.25 speed.

I began watching this last night, was blown away, and kept watching, even though I rarely watch anything over 10 minutes. If it’s not literally everything you could possibly want to know, it’s damn close.

They’re in the process of extracting out some sections on particular topic, like for HGH specifically. Check the channel directly for what they have.


  1. Owen Leahy on October 13, 2023 at 22:14

    Termendous post and progress Richard, cutting edge N=1 study. I myself have finally leaned into TRT recently, having come to terms with the facts of getting older and overcoming the ‘stigma’ (jesus…) of required exogenous help. Already it’s night and day in terms of just the sense of well-being and engagement in life.

    The posted video is sensational, and it would be tough to imagine 2 more effective participants in such a wide ranging and freeflowing discussion. Both are exceptionally well grounded in the sphere and are terrific conversationalists: neither feels the need to be ‘heard’ or to demonstrate their knowledge, but are comfortable enough to let the other express themselves and allow the exchange lead them where it may and be on solid ground all the while. Staggering quality of information being shared extemporaneously, with neither apparently referring to notes. Gold standard!
    Dr Attia has impressed me greatly since I came across him a few months ago, while Derek NPND has been delivering brilliant stuff for years.

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