Nikoley Update With a Bit of Everything

— I suppose it’s overdue…

In this crazy-life update:

  1. The reason behind my brief once-in-four-years trip back to the USA. I can talk about it now.
  2. The continuing progress in the gym as I smash personal records at the age of 63.
  3. Preview of a diet hack that completely eliminates a lifelong chronic heartburn problem (no drugs, supplements, or even “special procedures”…it’s duh-dumb, is what it is, one that makes you wonder WTF?). Bonus: there’s a surprising secret within that secret, too.
  4. A Thailand Confidential Update that will leave you guys with miserable [no] sex-lives crying for help. Yea, photos of my Thai-Chick “harem” included.

… And further, as to #4, remember there’s this:

In my continuing efforts to make that bootcamp experience quite the thing, and especially the hard copy only Top Secret Guidebook, I’ve undertaken quite a structured and disciplined life of “experiencing” a whole lot of women over the last several months, even women-initiated threesomes. Lots. I come away with understandings I did not take away when essentially doing the same thing in my 20s whilst chock-full of hormonal spit & vinegar. Back then, it was just all about the sex-drive fun…being what you’re supposed to be at that age.

Doing so in your early 60s and taking notes…well, let’s say having those notes in my 20s would have saved my hundreds of thousands of dollars in practice-makes-perfect ways. Dudes looking into and thinking about doing this aren’t serious if they aren’t members. Just saying. Anyone can book with me, but I won’t take you seriously if you’re not a member.

1. I recently made a trip back to the United States prompted by the need to visit my mother. Over the past year, she has developed a medical condition that gradually worsened. Around Christmas, it escalated to what seemed an inevitable conclusion: the end of her life. I returned for what I anticipated would be our final visit. After a week with her, that was the grim reality I left behind.

In such scenarios, I’ve always been emotionally detached—a trait I believe I share with my mother. It’s a detachment that comes with the acceptance of life’s natural ebb and flow. Now, having been back for about three weeks, there’s been an unexpected turn. Her condition has improved, defying the usual pattern where each rally in health is weaker than the last, and each relapse more severe. It takes a significant rebound to alter such a trend, and that’s what seems to have occurred.

I’ve refrained from writing about this situation for numerous reasons, primarily personal ones. The uncertainty of the outcome also gave me pause. But now, with a fighting chance emerging and conversations with my mother reminiscent of her clarity from months past, I can acknowledge some hope in the ordeal. That is the sole reason for my visit to the United States.

2. I sometimes pause to consider my genetic makeup, given that I continue to defy the odds, making impressive gains in the gym. It’s likely due to sheer, raw dedication. I’ve never been this committed before. It’s become a part of me, an unstoppable five-day-a-week ritual. I even walk the 2km there and back, today adding a challenging ascent of a few hundred meters of hill for some extra cardio. The fat is gradually disappearing, while I’m gaining lean muscle and strength. I’m in the final stretch, the last four weeks of a 16-week program, broken into four distinct phases—each with its own style, volume, and intensity.

To those who preach one method, whether it’s high intensity or high volume, I say: you don’t “have” to do anything. What you should consider is varying your methodologies. Change up the intensity, time under load, pace—from explosive to slow—and volume. That’s what I’m doing. It’s about touching on every aspect and finding your peak. It’s been working wonders for me.

Preferences evolve over time. Right now, I’m enjoying it all. I’ve embarked on a new phase of high volume. For example, yesterday began with 10 sets of 10 reps. It’s intense. Today, I tackled the incline bench, previously managing two sets of eight reps at 60kg. I doubted I’d complete seven sets of five reps at the same weight, but I set up the bar anticipating the need to strip weights. To my astonishment, I powered through all seven sets at 60kg without reducing the load.

I’m damn proud, though I admit, the last two sets challenged me. I stretched my rest period before the final set, and even paused at full extension on the fourth rep to muster the strength for a fifth. But I did it. It was a stellar day, and this program has been a success.

In three weeks, this chapter ends, and I’ll be on to the next – something even bigger and better.

3. The secret within the secret—and let’s be clear, this revelation isn’t a product of my original thinking, I’m merely the messenger here—originates from a confidant, recently settled in Thailand. Their identity remains confidential, and while I’m itching to spill the beans, discretion prevails. Expect an in-depth post once I’ve compiled sufficient personal data.

The chronic affliction I’m referring to is heartburn, or as some call it, indigestion or gastric reflux. It’s that searing sensation in your throat, an unwelcome visitor since my youth. Sure, various dietary approaches offer relief—low-carb is touted for its efficacy, but it’s not foolproof. And let’s be real, we’re omnivores craving a hearty, balanced meal, not some ascetic diet. So, if you’re not about to subsist on greens and forgo the hearty satisfaction of a loaded plate, what then?

This leads us to a modest yet transformative routine. It’s not a miracle drug, nor does it involve exotic supplements or complex procedures. It’s about changing how you eat, meal by meal, granting you the power to banish heartburn from your life. And no, it’s not just about masticating your food into oblivion—though that might happen naturally.

I’ve teased you enough, but let’s hammer this home: the solution is practical, devoid of pharmaceutical intervention, and squarely within your control. Stay tuned.

It’ll be a full post with…[no] research. That’s because I cannot find anything whatsoever. Maybe because it’s so obvious and intuitive, maybe because it works so naturally.

3. Alright, let’s delve into the topic that most of you are probably highly interested in—the salacious, lascivious, and depraved world of “Thailand Confidential.” Writing about this is challenging. I aim to be transparent without veering into vulgarity or pornography. It truly is a tough row to hoe. For me, however, it’s an intriguing subject to tackle because it subjects me to heaps of derision, ridicule, disdain, and the like. But I thrive on that. I know who I am, and the opinions of others are inconsequential to me. I don’t care. In fact, I view much of the virtue-signaling, condemnation, and moralizing as either a commentary from those who lack understanding or experience, or as a basic cry for help from those dissatisfied with their own lives.

If your life, particularly your sex life, is unsatisfactory, there’s no shame in that—unless you fail to take any action to improve it. I say this, astonished at how long I neglected this aspect of my life and the profound layers of deception we wade through. Society has, in many ways, worked to psychologically emasculate men. The good news is that if you overcome and conquer these societal constraints, the result isn’t becoming a porn star or sexual predator. On the contrary, you gain an understanding of how male porn stars manage their performance. There are specific techniques that can become second nature once you become hyper-sexually active, as I have.

With that said, let’s move on to an update—a photo update—on my current “harem.”

Let’s take it from the top left, clockwise.

First up is Far. She’s the protagonist of an unusual story—though all these stories are necessarily unique—that’s a big part of how I pick ’em. Far hails from rural Isaan in Thailand, a locale embedded in rice paddies, which is somewhat distinct due to the considerable number of foreigners residing there. These expatriates are typically older men who have married young Thai women, a phenomenon that has been occurring for decades.

Far’s first romantic relationship was with a Thai man, and at the tender age of 16, she became a mother to a daughter. That relationship ended, and some years later, she found herself with another partner. This union resulted in a son, who is now around 20 years old. Some years later, Far was introduced to an Englishman visiting friends in the area. Notably, she never worked as a bar girl or freelancer. Her seven-year relationship with the Englishman produced a son, but due to his drinking habits turning him into an insanely jealous man when plastered, their partnership eventually dissolved. It’s been 12 years since that split.

About a year ago, in need of money owing to Covidiocy bullshit, Far arrived in Pattaya. Her intention wasn’t to work the bars or engage in freelance work, but rather to pursue various odds and ends, taking advantage of the economic opportunities the area has to offer. It wasn’t long before she embarked on a new venture, starting a small sidewalk restaurant. Now, at 44 years old, she is one of “my girls” who stops by, and she’s fantastic. There’s more to her story, but let’s move on to number two.

We come next to Na, otherwise known as my kryptonite. Look at her—those eyes. She’s the one you have to be on guard with. You must be careful what you say because everything can and will be used against you in the court of human interaction, especially in relationships between men and women. It’s just how they’re made.

She just turned 43 and clearly has lived a life that has men, weak in the knees, falling head over heels for her. And she knows it. So, she can be as flippant, as irrational, as emotional as she wants to be. It doesn’t matter. But given that so many physically desirable women, who are also adept sexually, are like that, what is a man to do? Do you just toss them aside? Can you? Where do you work at it? Do you learn something from it? I’ve chosen the latter, and I have learned a lot.

I’ve mentioned her before; there’s a lot of details. Things started going south after about nearly two months. Just a few weeks before I went to the USA, where I largely ignored her, I got the “crawling back” message just as I was leaving. I decided to test her by purposefully playing a role, giving in to everything she wants to see how far she would take it. And she failed that test miserably, as far as it went…I put a stop to it five days later. It seemed that there was no end in sight to how much she would take advantage.

However, there is a background explanation. She’s not just working men; she’s also a pig farmer, believe it or not. She owns a farm in Buriram, Thailand, and also out in Isaan. She raises 100 pigs at a time, with about a four-month cycle that produces a gross income of between $35,000 and $40,000 each cycle. she’s by no means poor, but she’s sometimes cash-poor at time, having the feed suppliers and credit with those suppliers, so on, so forth. This muddies the waters as to what she’s about. She’s not just some gold digger looking for jewelry or whatever. There’s more to follow on that score; the story is by no means over.

But I will say this: what I’ve learned mostly about this whole thing is that the less you say, the better. The more you ignore her, the better. Rather than trying to be clever, or trying to correct her ways or do anything, you just…the more she messes up, the more you pull away and ignore, just let her learn her own lessons through omission. And by omission, I mean just not being there when she feels she needs you and figuring out why the fuck that is.

The rest of the story may seem implausible, yet you’ll believe it anyway. The individuals in question, Far and Na, are best friends. About three weeks into my encounters with Na, she arrived with Far one evening and introduced her, saying, “Richard, this is my friend Far, and I want to watch you fuck her.” God as my witness. Hence, my acquaintance with Far. The threesomes that ensued were nothing short of wow and more. Now, the dynamic has evolved into something distinct—one or the other currently—with no visible tension between them. Puzzling, isn’t it?

Far was over, alone, just last night. A great time…

It’s a different ethos entirely and I’m still exploring (more study is required), but it goes on far more than I was aware of…a couple of non-lesbian good friends essentially sharing a man and not just over in another room but right under each-other’s noses. People in the West can shed their arrogance and preconceptions about such matters. I’ll reiterate: Thai culture boasts a venerable history of 5,000 years, outdating the 4,000-year-old traditions of Judaism by a thousand, and 3,000 years more than Christianity. So if you find yourself recoiling in horror or casting judgment based on your own cultural standards, recognize that your response may stem from ignorance. Or perhaps it’s merely another plea for attention—a cry for help.

If you retort that, “well, look at the disparity in economic development,” 1) it’s a tropical country, so you can’t starve or freeze to death…this carries through the whole fabric of human social development long term. It always lacked that imperative drive since so much of survival was the geographically given. And 2) they never had the slightest inclination to further their economic ends by exploiting natural resources the world over under the ruse and guise of saving it for Dog and Jeebus.

… Now, perhaps the craziest story of all is the one about the woman in the bottom row to the left. She is quite an enigma. After meeting her and engaging in conversation, she took a rather quick liking to me. She’s 37 years old, if you can believe it by looking at the photo. It wasn’t until later, when her garments had been removed, that I discovered—stand by for this—the body of an 18 or 20-year-old. There wasn’t a blemish, a stretch mark, an age spot, or anything of the sort. She’s truly a wonder of nature, and as for how that’s possible, I’ll offer the rest of the story.

She hails from rural Isaan, a common theme. From a young age, she was interested only in her grandmother’s rice farm. It wasn’t just any rice farm; it was substantial, and that’s all she did: work and manage it. In the process, she gained some business acumen. That was her life—her husband and family, if you will. When I met her and asked “what do you do,” she replied, straight in the eye, “I’m a rice farmer.”

Then her grandmother dies and then COVID happened, and due to bank financing and loans on the property, the farm came into peril.

At the age of 32, she left for Pattaya, intending to help finance things in a business-like fashion you know what I mean. The rest of that story is that upon arrival in Pattaya, she was a virgin at 32 years old. She had never had a boyfriend, never had a child—nothing. Her first lover was a foreigner; she had never been with a Thai man in her life. Still hasn’t. No interest.

Long story short, it makes for quite an interesting experience in the bedroom. In terms of pure technique, she’s probably the best of all four of these girls. There will certainly be more to this story. I haven’t fully gotten into her head yet, but I’m working on it.

… In any group composition, such as the trio of women I’m referring to, there seems to be merit in having one who can be categorized as the effortlessly frivolous companion—someone who’s laid-back, light-hearted, and devoid of drama or excessive seriousness. This would be Maliwan, the gal at the bottom left. At 41, she’s spent a considerable amount of time here in Pattaya. She operates as a pure freelancer, utilizing platforms like Thai Friendly to connect with men she finds suitable. She meets them, and if they click, they often become her regulars. This arrangement is how she sustains herself, and she’s unapologetic about it. She’s candid in expressing that she thrives on the thrill of meeting new men and enjoys the sex (ever felt that way about women, guys?), which is typically pleasing or at least acceptable to her. This lifestyle provides her with her financial support through gifts bestowed, while allowing her the freedom to do as she pleases—and she isn’t one to complain.

However, she does express frustration during that time of the month when she needs to take a few days off—that’s when you’ll hear her grumble. And to reiterate, she’s quite fond of sex. So, when Maliwan visits, she embodies a carefree spirit. The first thing she does is strip down and casually move about the house—whether it’s cleaning or doing the dishes—completely nude. She loves it and has the show-off body for it…even at 41, claiming that being “naked me” is something she enjoys and that it excites her. Frankly, she’s a riot—a source of constant laughter and enjoyment, which alone makes her one of my favorites.

Incidentally, Maliwan is also from Isaan, not too far from where I built my house. It’s just about an hour’s drive to the east. And undoubtedly, there will be more tales to come.

Those who have been following “Thailand Confidential” and its predecessor posts over the last four years are aware of my personal narratives. These include my endeavors towards monogamy, domesticity, and paternal roles which, to put it bluntly, have failed miserably. The full story remains untold, but in due time, it will be revealed. You’ve often heard me mention the young 20-somethings. Indeed, my longer-term girlfriend was 27 when we met, and she had just turned 30 when our relationship ended. Recently, she turned 31. This has been the pattern of my pursuits.

However, a shift is evident. The women pictured that I’m currently involved with are predominantly in their 40s, save for one who is 37. This should indicate a change in my preferences. I’ve found the 35 to 45 age range to be ideal, contingent upon them maintaining their physical health. This is a stark contrast to what I perceive in approximately 80-90% of Western women, who let themselves go, becoming obese and, frankly, unfuckable. I’m candid in my assessments; the situation is repugnant, especially when compared to what’s available here in Thailand.

Thailand, too, is facing a growing obesity problem, primarily among women. But to put it into perspective, it’s akin to discussing America’s burgeoning obesity crisis during the 50s and 60s. It’s still a relatively small portion of the population here. The 35 to 45 age bracket, I have come to conclude, is my standard “wheelhouse.” I do “audition” younger women occasionally, ranging from 20 upwards. Some in their 20s are satisfactory, but they’re not compelling enough to replace any of the mainstays. Managing more four at a time is already a substantial amount of work and distraction—but if not me undertaking that work and study, then who?

With time and experience, my selection process has become more discerning, focusing on minutiae—only because I have the luxury of choice. It takes a significant appeal to unseat someone already in place. Feelings do develop, albeit I strive to maintain a level of detachment.

… One final note, for those considering the Pattaya, Thailand Boot Camp: don’t procrastinate. Secure your spot and consult with me to determine the schedule. What I’ve outlined is within your reach, whether you’re a resident here or a frequent visitor. I’ll guide you through the ins & outs in intricate detail. If this lifestyle isn’t your cup of tea, that’s perfectly fine. I respect that. I wish you well in your marriage, family life, sex life—whatever your situation. However, if there’s a void there, I can offer assistance.

And if you’re mulling over the idea but haven’t yet committed to membership, it’s time to get serious. Remember, members receive a discount, and frankly, your head’s not in the game if you’re hesitant to invest in membership. So, take the leap and get that sorted. That’s the bottom line.


Since Covid killed my Cabo San Lucas vacation-rental business in 2021, this is my day job. I can't do it without you. Memberships are $10 monthly, $20 quarterly, or $65 annually. Two premium coffees per month. Every membership helps finance this work I do, and if you like what I do, please chip in. No grandiose pitches.


  1. Pete Collins on February 7, 2024 at 09:10

    Hey Rich
    The mother part, I hear you, mine in UK, me in Oz, makes it tricky. all the best to your mum.

    Re the workouts, Bravo!
    I became unstuck from the big 5 HIT 1 set failure prison of the mind around 10 months ago.
    I workout min 4 hours a week with weights, mix up exercises, set numbers, rep numbers from 5 reps 3 sets, to 25 reps 1 set, cluster sets, lots of rest between exercises, little rest between exercises, pre exhaust movements, calves 2 times a day, forearms 2 times a day, walks, ocean swimming, all of it.

    I feel mentally free & most of all, rarely fatigued at age 56, I am leaner & built more muscle mass in this time, than 10 years of HIT routines 1 set.
    Eat twice a day, steaks, steaks, steaks, potatoes, a little fruit, some toast, some eggs, coffee, cream.
    The booze is only occasional Guinness or Irish whiskey on weekend.

    Cant knock it, my N=1 works.


  2. Georgene Harkness on February 9, 2024 at 04:40

    I’m sorry I missed out on the opportunity to meet your parents a few years back. As I recall, a multi-hour freeway shut-down going into Houston delayed us as we watched Life-Flight load up the remains (still alive I suppose, or they wouldn’t have tried so hard). We had planned to meet the evening before our separate cruises, but it was not to be. It would have been fun to observe and learn of the people who produced such progeny as you! I am always curious about the origins of exceptional people.

    I’m glad to hear your mother’s health rallied, and I hope it continues to do so, but we all know we have a “date” with the unavoidable, that at least maybe can be postponed. For a while. Keep us updated, to the extent you wish to, please.

    All the rest in this post is greatly entertaining, though probably not in the same way to me as it is to your male readers. I’m glad for you, though. No school-marm shaming or moralizing here. And a final thought: how nice to know I never have to pay you again! My goal now is to make my “lifetime” membership last long enough for you to regret it!

    • Richard Nikoley on February 9, 2024 at 05:43

      “My goal now is to make my “lifetime” membership last long enough for you to regret it!”

      I wish the same thing…though, mostly for those future Lifetime members who pop for 10K!

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